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BEND ME: A Dark Romance Page 4
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They ate in relative silence for a few minutes, both of them evidently hungry enough to focus on the food for a little while instead of each other, but as time went by and Fiona became gradually looser as a result of the wine, a question from earlier pestered at her, picking away at her brain until she finally opened her mouth to ask it out loud.
“It seemed to bother you earlier when I said Guido might be the better fit for your dad’s position. Why?” Fiona asked.
Vince’s fork froze in midair, suspended between his plate and his mouth. He stared at her for a long moment before answering. “Because it’s not true,” he finally said, clearing his throat before taking another bite.
“Explain,” Fiona said, even though she had a feeling she already knew the answer. After all, she’d spent the last year with Guido breathing down her neck, making disgusting comments whenever she wore anything more revealing than a burlap sack. He clearly wanted to fuck her, which would never happen as long as she lived. At the same time, he was a brutish, cruel bully that liked to torture the servants of the Romano compound, making them do pointless tasks just for his own amusement. Any of these reasons should have been enough by themselves to justify passing Guido over for the don position, but she still wanted Vince’s opinion on the matter.
“Because,” Vince began, chewing slowly in between words, “he’s an idiot. He’s simple-minded.”
That wasn’t exactly the answer she was expecting to hear. “Go on,” Fiona prompted Vince, her curiosity piqued beyond the point of no return. She simply had to know what he meant now.
“You know what I mean,” Vince said, washing down his words with another huge gulp of wine. “He sees what he wants, and he grabs it without thinking. That’s a bad way to do business in the long-term.”
“And you don’t do that?” Fiona asked. She was a little skeptical, honestly, knowing what she did about Vince’s reputation as a playboy in New York. He definitely seemed like the type of man who wouldn’t hesitate to fuck a girl the second he met her.
But Vince shook his head, swallowing heavily to clear his mouth before speaking again. “Not when I have a choice. It’s like…say you have a really cheap, kind of mediocre meal. You might eat it right away, just to fill your stomach and get it over with. And then you forget about it. But with a meal like this…” He paused, gesturing to the food around them, which still made Fiona’s mouth water. “With something like this, it takes time to prepare, and it takes time to appreciate. You don’t rush through it. That way, you can appreciate as much of it as you possibly can. Me? I like to take my time. Do things right. You know what I mean?”
Fiona wasn’t sure that she did know what he meant, except that for some reason, she was finding it hard to breathe. Her heartbeat had traveled up to her ears, now pounding against her temples. She didn’t know if her body was telling her to run away, to get as far away from this man as possible, or if it was saying that she should get closer. All she knew was that her fingers were now trembling, powerfully enough that Vince could probably see her knife shake, despite how tightly she was clutching it.
After a long pause where neither of them spoke, Vince broke the silence again. “What about you? Do you like to go quick…or slow?”
Fiona forced out a chuckle and gave herself a tiny reprieve by taking a long sip of wine, giving her brain enough time to come up with a semi-appropriate response. “With food? It depends on how hungry I am.”
“How hungry are you now?” Vince asked, smiling at her with that hunger in his eyes again, that sharp desire that made him look like his entire face was made out of perfect, unbreakable glass.
“Starving,” Fiona said, her tongue moving of its own accord, speaking that one word without her brain’s consent. Immediately after the word left her mouth, she felt her whole body got hot with fear and shock. It was like some demon had possessed her, telling her what to say and do, responding to some equally devious demon inside of Vince.
Except deep down, she knew that wasn’t true. If there was something inside of her, directing her like a puppet, it was only her soul.
Vince stopped grinning at her, his face turning serious, all of his features turning to stone. “Are you?” he whispered, reaching his hand across the table in Fiona’s direction.
She stared down at it for a long moment, unsure what he was asking her to do. “I—I don’t know,” she stuttered out in response, feeling tiny beads of sweat appear at the base of her neck, right under her hairline.
“I think you do,” Vince said, slowly pulling his hand back and then getting to his feet. “Come on. I want to show you something.”
Fiona felt like she was standing at the edge of a precipice. One wrong move and she could hurtle downward towards the abyss, losing total control over herself. She didn’t know what he wanted to do specifically, but she knew it had nothing to do with the business. If she was smart, if she cared about her job, if she was really the good career-focused, family-centered girl that she claimed to be, she would have already pulled her napkin out of her lap, thanked him for dinner, and walked out. But she didn’t.
Slowly, feeling her entire body shake more intensely with each passing second, she got to her feet. She swallowed around the dryness in her mouth and looked up to face Vince, staring him directly in the eyes. Somehow, that did the trick. His eyes seemed to suck all of the fear out of her body, leaving her buzzing with anticipation. She walked around the table to get closer to him, bending her neck up so she could maintain intense eye contact the whole time. And then she said it—two words, powerful enough to destroy her whole world.
“Show me.”
Chapter Six
Vince felt like his whole body was vibrating, every single skin cell standing on edge, waiting to see what would happen next. Staring down into Fiona’s wide, honest eyes, he was so tempted to reach out and touch her, to grab her hand and tug her along to his playroom, to toss her in headfirst and see how she would react. But no, he had to smart about this. He couldn’t afford to fuck this up. For one thing, he needed Fiona around to show him the ropes of his father’s business. Nobody else knew the ins and outs of all of the drug and gun deals except her, and it also wasn’t like he could trust anybody else in the inner circle either. She was essential. She was irreplaceable.
But if he was being honest with himself, he knew that wasn’t the real reason he was so nervous about showing her the playroom. There was something he could sense under her skin, like her very blood sang to him, telling him what she really wanted. She was a Sub. He just knew it. He could feel it the same way he felt the wind in his hair or the sun on his skin. There was an animal in her that responded to the call of the beast within his chest, and he wasn’t going to rest until he claimed it.
“Come with me,” he said softly to Fiona, careful not to brush up against her body as he walked past her. When he touched her, he wanted it to be deliberate. Calculated. Controlled. He wasn’t going to do it carelessly.
As he led her down to the hallway behind the dining room, towards the door of his playroom, he felt a huge lump start to form at the base of his throat, right under his pulse. Was he really doing this? After so many months searching for his Sub, did he finally find the right person? Or was he just so desperate, so goddamn hungry for it that he tricked himself into believing it was safe to share his true self with this person he’d just met? Vince knew he was being reckless. Idiotic, really. But he just couldn’t stop himself. His body knew what it wanted, and it was going to see this through to the very end, even if it meant destroying his life in the process.
“Here,” Vince said as he came to a stop in front of the playroom, his heart thudding loudly in his ears. He felt the rush of his blood from inside his veins, going faster and faster as he noticed a glint of intense curiosity in Fiona’s eyes.
“What…” Fiona began to say, but Vince lifted his hand to gently cut her off. She fell silent immediately, sending a rush of exhilaration down Vince’s spine that almost caused him to physically shiver. He he
ld himself back, though. He couldn’t afford to get too easily excited, even though he felt like his skin was about ready to jump off of his body entirely just as a result of Fiona’s simple, quiet obedience.
“Before I show you this room,” Vince began, struggling to keep his voice as steady and calm as possible, “I have to get your word on something. Whatever your decision may be about the contents of this room, you cannot divulge what you see here to anybody. And I mean that. Anybody at all. If you do, and I find out, I can’t have you working for me anymore. It’s that serious.”
Fiona’s face paled a little, some of the color that had seeped into her cheeks as a result of the wine faded as she considered Vince’s words. But when she spoke, her voice was unwavering. “Okay. I understand that. I’ll be discreet.”
“Good,” Vince replied curtly, even though he felt an almost overwhelming sense of relief crash over him. He had an insurance policy, at least, that would keep Fiona from telling anybody what a freak he was. Some part of him knew that it was unfair for him to keep the job hanging over her head like a dagger, ready to drop at any moment that she did anything wrong. But it wasn’t like he wanted to fire her. If anything, he needed her much more than she needed him. She could always find another job, even if it didn’t pay quite as well as her current position. But he couldn’t find a replacement for Fiona. There was nobody else that knew the business as well as she did, nobody that knew his father the way she did. Vince really should have been fighting as hard as he could to keep her on board, especially after offending her so badly earlier in the day, but the playroom’s secrets meant more to him than the business. It meant more than the power he’d inherited from his father, more than his place in his family, and much more than the legacy of his name. He had to protect the playroom above all else.
He blew out his breath, aware that he hadn’t spoken for several seconds, which probably only heightened both of their anxieties. “I’m going to show you something that means very much to me,” Vince said softly, stepping a little closer to Fiona so he could comfortably drop his voice, even though there was nobody else in the apartment to prevent from overhearing his words. “It means…everything to me, really. I’m not saying this to scare you or freak you out or anything. I just want you to understand so that when you see it, you’ll realize how much power I’m really giving you here.”
He paused so Fiona could respond, but she didn’t say anything, even though a few wrinkles appeared in between her eyebrows and on her forehead, as if she was concentrating furiously to commit his words to memory. So Vince kept talking, forcing the words out as bravely as he could, even though he felt his fingers start to tremble even as he kept them still against his sides. “This is my playroom. This is where I…have fun.”
“Like an arcade?” Fiona asked, a slight smile spreading across her face. Somehow, though, Vince got the sense that she wasn’t mocking him. Instead, he felt like if he really did have a room full of video games and foosball tables, she would have accepted it as normal without judging him for his immaturity. He almost smiled, just picturing it.
All the same, Vince shook his head, summoning up all the courage he could find in his entire body to plunge forward into the unknown, spilling the truth out into the air around them. “No. For sex. Specifically, the kind of sex that I have.”
Fiona’s jaw dropped open for a second before she caught herself and closed it. He half-expected her to back away from him, to put some kind of distance between their bodies as a safety precaution. But she didn’t move, and she didn’t look away from him either. Instead, her eyes remained open, unflinching as she stared into his eyes. Vince took that as a good sign. She’s not scared yet, at least, he told himself as he moved to put a hand on the handle of the playroom’s door.
“I need to be in control during sex,” Vince said, and even though he managed to get the words out without allowing his voice to shake, he had to drop his eyes from Fiona’s. He just had to. There was no way he could be brave enough to look at her directly when he was spilling the deepest, darkest secret of his heart. “It’s the only way I’m satisfied. This…” He paused, gesturing to the playroom behind them, “helps me do that. I want to be clear that I never want to hurt my partners. I never want to do anything to them that they don’t want done. But this is the way I am. There’s no changing it.” He smiled sadly at the end, finally lifting his gaze again to see if there was any horror to be found on Fiona’s face. He almost lost his breath when he realized that he couldn’t detect any disapproval or disgust hiding within her eyes. “Do you have any questions?” he asked as soon as the ability to speak returned to him.
Fiona cleared her throat and nodded slowly. “Yes. A lot of them, actually.”
The back of Vince’s neck flushed. He wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not.
“Why are you telling me this?” Fiona asked softly, blinking slowly as she continued to stare at Vince.
“That’s a fair question,” Vince admitted. He knew he hadn’t been very clear with her, even though he was working as hard as he could to force himself to be honest before things got any more serious between them than they already had. “I’ll be frank with you, Fiona. I’ve been looking to share this room with someone for a very long time, but I haven’t had much luck. Most women I meet are too timid or scared or…boring, quite honestly. It’s been a very long time since I’ve been able to be honest with anyone. So I’m trying to be up-front with you. If you’re not interested in me, in doing anything with me, then let me know now, and we can forget this conversation ever happened. I don’t want to cross any lines. But…” Vince paused again, licking his lips. “I think there’s something different about you. Something special. I think you have potential that I haven’t seen in any woman, ever. I want to see if I’m right. I want to explore you, Fiona.”
After a few seconds of silence, Fiona stepped a little closer to Vince, sending a wave of heat crashing over his head. The trembling in his fingers traveled up his arms as he fought to stay still as she got closer to him. He expected her to say something, maybe even spit in his face, but she just stared up at him wordlessly.
Vince wasn’t sure what she was telling him, but she wasn’t running away. If she was scared, her courage was apparently stronger than any fear she might have felt. More than anything, her eyes burned with some desire that made Vince feel like his very bones were shaking under his skin. She wanted to stay. That much was clear. She wanted to know what was in this room. Maybe she even wanted to know Vince.
Vince tried not to betray the surprise and the wonderful, practically crushing, relief he felt. He wanted to look like he knew that she was strong enough to take it, like he hadn’t had a single shred of doubt in his mind. “Before I show you this room, I have to set a few ground rules. Just for our safety, okay?”
Fiona nodded slowly, still looking up at him with wide, curious eyes.
“You don’t have to enter this room. I want to give you an out if you want it. You can leave right now, and we’ll never talk about this again. You’ll get to keep your job, and I won’t harass you. There will be no repercussions at all if you decide to go.”
He waited, providing a long pause where Fiona could walk away from him if she wanted to. But she didn’t move.
“If, however, you decide to come into the playroom…” Vince said, dropping his voice down to a whisper. It would have felt profane, almost sacrilegious, for him to speak louder about this. It was like a religious experience, sharing this moment, where the air seemed to crackle around them with the energy generated by both of their bodies. “Then that means that you will be under my power for the rest of the night. I will tell you what to do, and you will have to obey. That is, unless you use the safe word. You can pick out a word to signal to me that you do not feel safe, and I will immediately stop what I’m doing and make sure that you’re okay.”
Fiona grinned suddenly, a mischievous glint appearing in her eyes as she bit down on her bottom lip in thought. “I
f I can use the safe word whenever I want, doesn’t that mean I’m the one really in control?”
Vince couldn’t fight the smile that forced its way onto his face in response to her statement. “You’re right. Very good. You’re a quick student.”
Fiona shrugged bashfully. “Well, I guess you could say you’re a good teacher.”
Vince stared at her for a long moment, drinking in every last detail of her face and body before he finally spoke again. “I want to be clear with you, even though I know I’ve probably already hammered this point home enough. What happens in the playroom stays in the playroom. You can’t share this with anybody, and when we’re outside of it, we won’t discuss what happened inside. When we’re in the office, we’ll be totally professional. It has to work that way, otherwise things can get messy fast.”
“I understand,” Fiona said confidently, smiling up at him warmly. Her eyes seemed to change again, the glint of mischief from before giving way to something deeper, something less easy to read. But she was excited, Vince could discern that much at least. Her body seemed to hum with anticipation, her fingers clenching into fists at her sides like she was ready to hit something in impatience.